One Fish, Two Fish, Red Fish, Blue Fish
In 1960, when I started first grade, Dr. Seuss published what was to become one of my favorite books, One Fish, Two Fish, Red Fish, Blue Fish. It had a level of literary sophistication that far outstripped the mundane stories about Dick, Jane, and Sally from our beginning readers. I remember staring at the fanciful pictures of colorful fish and painstakingly puzzling out the associated words from the letter sounds and phonics rules we were learning. The book is surprisingly long as every parent who has read it for the umpteenth time can tell you. It catalogs a number of fanciful pets that flow from Dr. Seuss’s more-than-fertile imagination in ways that stimulate wordplay for young and old. But it was the first few pages that most influenced me. Not only did they fuel my desire to read, but more importantly, these pages stimulated my lifelong interest in fishing.
One fish, two fish, red fish, blue fish. The depth of prophetic import contained in the Dr.’s immortal words is simply stunning. Or at least I can hope. One or two fish would mean that I am not skunked, as I have been so far in Georgia’s murky winter waters. But as any piscatologist can tell you, the eschatological meaning of this oracle is fuzzy. My real hope lies in the fact that Georgia actually has both Redfish and Bluefish.
The scarlet species is variously called Drum, Spottail Bass, Red Drum, Bass, Channel Bass, and Red Bass but in Georgia, they are simply called Redfish, demonstrating Georgia’s highly literary sensibility. What else would you call them after full indoctrination by Seuss’s nearly Biblical treatise on the subject? I am told that Georgia’s coast provides a year-round fishery for Redfish which range in size from 12 inches to 50 inches and beyond. Wow! That thought itself is nirvana for a guy who goes into ecstasy over catching an eight-inch brook trout.
Bluefish are also coastal and are highly migratory, moving with the temperature of the water. They come in range of Georgia fishermen during the spring and fall, frequently being caught between a pound and twelve pounds, almost certainly larger than an eight-inch brook trout. The pundits agree that the chief value of a Bluefish is in its thrilling ability to fight since it brings questionable results to the dinner table.
Regardless of color, Georgia’s piscatorial fame is firmly tied to the species of fish simply called Bass. This is not to be confused with the orchestra’s largest instrument in the viol family. The darling of the Peach State’s fishery is pronounced with a short “a” like cat or bat. Those of us who have done an in-depth study One Fish, Two Fish, Red Fish, Blue Fish truly appreciate the phonetic distinction.
In preparation for my nomadic migration to Georgia this winter, I purchased the book, Bass Fishing in Georgia by Jimmy Jacobs. Originally published in 1998, this book is now out of print, but I can’t imagine that bass have changed that much since then, so I feel confident that it is plenty up to date. The book audaciously claims that the largemouth bass is “the king of gamefish in Georgia’s waters.” I have no way to dispute that. In fact, they have completely reigned over me as my empty kreel can attest.
Although Jimmy Jacobs’ lovely little book provides an amazing summary of the bass fishing potential in a majority of Georgia’s lakes and rivers, it tends to look at fishing from the perspective of a boat. Herein lies the catch and a possible explanation for my recently fishless outings. My boat is nicely winterized in North Idaho. A fat lot of good it does for me there. Truthfully, my Crestliner Sportfish is too large to tow around the country. Consequently, domestic negotiations have begun about a second more nomadic boat. However, wearing down my wife’s resolve is like taking a toothbrush to the Rock of Gibraltar. I remain hopeful that constant comments about the usefulness of a portable fishing boat and enlisting the assistance of my more sympathetic relatives will eventually win the day. Who knows?
Meanwhile, I’ve started watching YouTube videos about bank fishing for bass. Well, I’ve also watched a few videos about kayaks and Jon boats, but don’t tell my wife. So far, my odyssey through the plethora of YouTube contributors who like to video themselves while fishing has been enlightening. Obviously, a little bit of knowledge is a dangerous thing, and I’m desperately hoping that it turns out to be so for some unlucky bass. We shall see.
I’ve recently found a YouTube series that is providing truly useful content. Gene Jensen displays his passion for “teaching the world to fish” in a very accessible way on his Flukemaster channel. His series on Bass Fishing for Beginners has served as a real inspiration. It is a little humiliating to admit that I’m a beginning bass fisherman when I have presented nightcrawlers under bobbers to millions of bass for the majority of my life. But the stark truth is that I really don’t have a clue about how to effectively fish for bass. These videos made that clear in short order.
For instance, the video where Gene wandered through a Sportsman’s warehouse in Chattanooga talking about basic fish tackle for bass took me into a distant land where they spoke a foreign language about Texas rigs, bent shank wide-mouthed hooks, and spinnerbaits. I restarted the video and watched from the beginning, stopping frequently to take careful notes.
The resulting list precipitated a reasonably expensive trip to Walmart. My cart filled with an odd assortment of pointy wiry things, flashing floppy items, and gooey multicolored monstrosities. As I reached to pick up Gene’s recommended inexpensive plastic case to store my new hardware, my eyes drifted to the ultimate tackle storage system. Ironically, when we moved out of our house in October, I had thrown away a sizable collection of backpacks. However, at that moment, only a snazzy backpack with endless pockets and plastic trays for stowing a massive array of fish getting hardware was sure to bring in that eight-inch bass to go with my trophy trout. Walmart to the rescue!
Well, almost. When I got to the car, I learned that the new rod I had purchased would not separate into the two pieces necessary to fit into my car. Walmart customer service kindly took it back and I found one for four dollars less at Dick’s Sporting Goods. That was unexpected. Dick’s also helped with completing Gene’s list but, in the end, I had to turn to Amazon to finish.
I am so excited! The fateful day I catch my multi-ounce lunker is approaching. I’ve researched Jimmy Jacob’s Bass Fishing in Georgia. I’ve studied Gene Jenson’s Flukemaster videos. All of the fishing gear I bought is out of its packaging, neatly stowed in my amazing tackle backpack. I’m ready to live my bass-catching dreams. Do you think I should pack a copy of One Fish, Two Fish, Red Fish, Blue Fish just for luck? It couldn’t hurt.